eff

really hate this year. pretty much everything i assumed was going to happen didn't happen. and i am sufficiently heartbroken about that. i really don't know what to do for the next couple of months and it's kind of driving me insane. i mean, i should probably just do something about it right? but i am pretty accustomed to things just ~falling in my lap~, which i guess now at age 23 is wearing a bit thin. i really just need to write more, run more and read more. i feel like if i did these 3 things often i would be pretty happy. but i don't know. i should probably talk to people more often too. and not get hung up on dudes. yeah the getting hung up on dudes thing is probably my main problem. real life is so tricky!